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"...for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God."
--1 Corinthians 2:10b Mo Letters from David Berg and the Children of God / The Family

Revolutionary Marriage!

By David Brandt Berg, August 1973 No.260
I love my husband, I love my wife.

SCRIPTURAL, REVOLUTIONARY LOVEMAKING FOR THE MARRIED: Who would instruct me ... embrace me.--Song of Solomon 8:2-3.

YOUR RIGHT TO ENJOY MARRIED LOVE: Male and Female created He them ... they shall be one flesh ... Be fruitful and multiply--Gen.1 and 2.

Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled--Heb.13:4. Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence (lovemaking): also the wife unto the husband. ... Defraud not one another (don't withhold yourselves from each other), expect it be with consent. ... Come together ... for it is better to marry than to burn. ... If thou marry, thou hast not sinned--1Cor.7. Let the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house (marry young)--1Tim.5:14. To the pure all things are pure--Tit.1:15. Cherish (warm and soften) it, as the Lord the Church--Eph.5:29. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies ... as the Lord the Church--Eph.5:28.

WHERE: In bed--Heb.13:4 On the grass under the trees--SoS.1:16-17. In the field, the village or the vineyard--SoS.7:11-12. In a chariot--SoS.3:9-10. Variety is the spice of life!

WHEN: Ezk.16:7--The time of love (when you feel like it--day or night--even daily!). Eph.5:22--Wives submit ... as unto the Lord (even when you don't feel like it). Neither was the man created for woman, but the woman for the man--1Cor.11:9. Nevertheless, neither is the man without the woman, in the Lord--1Cor.11:11. (Without her, he's only half a man!)

HOW: With words--with much fair speech she causes him to yield, with the flattering of her lips she forced him--Pr.7:21. The voice of my beloved! ... My beloved spake. ... Sweet is the voice. ... My soul failed (yielded) when he spake. ... Instruct me--SoS.2:8,10,14; 5:6; 8:2. Saying, Open to me, my love!--SoS.5:2. (Guiding words and signals are so helpful--tell what you like!)

HOW TO EMBRACE: His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace (hug) me.--SoS.2:6; 8:3 (To be firmly clasped in his arms is thrilling to most women). Kissing: Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth--SoS.1:2. Thy lips drop (mouth open), honey and milk are under thy tongue (tongues touch and pet each other and explore the other's mouth.--The deep kiss is very sexually exciting, necessary for proper penetration). His mouth is sweet ... and the roof of thy mouth like the best wine.-- SoS.5:16; 7:9. Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well (saliva)--Pr.5:15. Suck and be satisfied with the breasts. ... Let her breasts satisfy thee at all times, and be thou ravished always with her love! O that thou wert as my brother that sucked the breasts. ... Until the day break I will get me to the mountain of myrrh. ... I will take hold of thy breasts. ... There were their breasts pressed--Pr.5:15-19; Isa.66:11; SoS.7:7-8; 8:1

Quotes from PASTORS II--No.49

BUT HONESTLY, I BELIEVE ONE OF THE GREATEST ASSETS TO A GOOD MARRIAGE IS HONESTY, ALONG WITH A SENSE OF HUMOR. DON'T HIDE ANYTHING FROM EACH OTHER! Share all things, and bear all things, and take no account of evil, and be able to laugh at the funny parts! Some women even get tickled while making love! I remember the night we heard one of our couples nearly splitting their sides in a lovemaking session! I don't know how they did it, but it sounded like a ball! My brother once said, "You take yourself too seriously," and this is possible sometimes! You may be taking the whole thing too seriously, it may not be half as bad as you think, and it might be better just to see the funny side of it all!

SOME OF YOU ARE BORN COMEDIANS, anyhow, and you always give us a laugh, which is usually good for us, and you use your talents to help cheer us up! Of course, some of you are just naturally funny without knowing it, and sometimes that can be a little hard on your pride! Like a friend of mine they hired for the circus as a clown, and when he asked them what he was supposed to do, they said, "Just act natural." So to be honest with yourself, maybe you just oughta act natural! Quit trying to "put on" and kid yourself and others that you're something you aren't. Just be your own sweet self, or better yet, be like Himself; but, whatever you do, don't try to fool us, or your mate, or God! You'll only wind up deceiving yourself!

PRAISE THE LORD? AMEN? I THINK WOMEN ARE NOT ONLY BEAUTIFUL, wonderful, soft and warm, but they're really funny! This is part of their being a help! Do you agree? And all the men said, "Amen"! Of course, men are funny, too, aren't they girls? And all the girls shrieked, "Hallelujah!" So the feeling's mutual! Ho, ho, ho! Thank God for a funny husband or wife! You'll get a good laugh every day, and really enjoy life! Ask God to help you to know when to laugh, and when to be sober, and how to know the difference! Some of the funniest times are when you're trying to be the most sober! Ask God to help you to be temperate in all thing, and be well balanced between the two! "Let your moderation be known to all men"! Don't be too sober, or too silly, either one, at least, not all the time!

SO MUCH FOR ADVICE TO THE LOVELORN. I'm not "Dear Abbey" or "Ann Landers," but maybe this will help some of you have a little more practical down-to-earth relationship, and know that you're both human being, and nobody's perfect--he's not the hero you thought he was, you're no angel, either--with the exception of my wife, of course! Of course, she may be like the woman whose husband said he knew his wife was an angel because she was always up in the air about something, always harping on something, and never had an earthly thing to wear! Are you that someone, always harping on something, and never having an earthly thing to wear? Are you that kind of angel? I hope not! God forbid, and help you to love him, be honest with him, and have a sense of humour!

THE RULE OF THUMB IS VERY SIMPLE--The solution is plain, but not always easy! God's Word makes it very clear, and it's summed up in the little slogan on priorities, "Jesus and Others, then you!" If you'll follow this simple rule, it'll keep you out of a lot of trouble! Jesus comes first! The first commandment is to love God! "For I the Lord thy God am a jealous God, and I will have no other gods before Me."--Not even His Work, or your mate, much less yourself! Some of you thought that by seeking first the Kingdom of God you were putting the King first--the King of kings, that is, but this is not always necessarily so! Sometimes you can neglect your fellowship with the King of kings because you're so busy with the affairs of the Kingdom, and this can be disastrous to your spiritual life and communion with the Lord! You cannot do the Master's Work without the Master's Power and Guidance! You can't make bedroom slippers for God, above His fellowship! Some of you have been guilty of this--and it's had serious consequences, however sincere and faithful you were to His Work! You must put Him first--God, that is, not the Work, not your husband, nor your wife, nor even others, only Jesus! He doesn't fit second place, and He won't take it! He won't stand for it, and you'll have trouble!

OTHERS HAVE PUT THE WORK BEFORE YOUR HUSBAND, but if your husband's ministry is your work, then this won't work, either, and what you're really trying to do is seek a self-glorifying ministry of your own, instead of being a helpmeet, as God intended for you to be! You'd better get with it, Sister--with him, I mean! Get it? Need I mention any names? I hate to have to do that, because it fits several of you, and I don't like to embarrass you before all who are reading this Letter, but you know who you are, and so does God, and so does everyone else, probably--everybody but you? I hope not! I hope you know who you are, and ask God to straighten you out!

THE SUPERIORITY OF A WIFE OVER HER HUSBAND IN SPIRITUAL THINGS, IN THIS DAY AND AGE IS NOT RARE! My mother was one, but they made a perfect team, because my father humbly and rightfully acknowledge it, and supplemented her ministry with his own gifts, which she lacked! She was a brilliant prophetess of God, and inspired leader, with many mighty spiritual gifts, and a strongly appealing public personality. She had the background for it, and was the rightful heir to her famous father's public talents, with a lifetime of training in the field from childhood! This is a tremendous heritage, which is hard to beat, if yielded to God, and used by the Spirit! My father was a handsome singer with a beautiful voice, and a brilliant and analytical teacher, with a terrific knowledge of the Word, as well as being practical and conservative in material matters, so that together they made a wonderful team, just as God had designed--as long as he was willing to let her lead in the field of her own talents, and not stand in her way! As a result, God gave them a mighty ministry, tens of thousands were saved and healed and helped and hundred went into a fulltime ministry for the Lord, many to mission fields abroad, and their influence still carries on in me my children, and you my children!

BUT THERE WAS A TIME IN THEIR LIVES WHEN HIS RELATIVES AND WELL-MEANING FRIENDS persuaded him that their relationship was not right, that he should take over and take the lead, spiritually and every other way, and make her a back seat, squelch her gifts, and silence her witness--and this nearly ruined them both! She tried to do it, but like Jeremiah, couldn't! He tried to domineer, but only got in God's way, and God's Work rolled right on over him, and left him far behind, using me, to help carry on her ministry, and he wound up a broken, disheartened man; whereas, I went on in sense, to steal his crown, sad to say! I'm sure he'll be rewarded for the days he was faithful, and the wonderful Christian heritage he gave to me, which made it possible, but he lost part of his reward in the end, and instead of becoming a great teacher and flaming evangelist, as he had hoped, his friends had only lured him from the Great Wall that he was building with my mother, and he came down to almost nothing in the end! Don't let it happen to you! Don't stand in God's Way, even if it's God in your wife, or you'll be sorry, and so will she, for she may have to go on without you, as my mother did, rather than fail God, and God is more than able, in these exception cases, to supply her with a better co-worker, who will acknowledge her gifts, give way to her ministry, and do everything he can do help her perform it, as I did, for I took his place! Don't fail God, so that He has to let someone take yours! And don't feel sorry for yourself, and try to blame it on God, and quit! Self-pity is pride; hurt feelings are damnable, stinking self, and at the root of every doubt, there is sin, the heinous, diabolical sin, of rebellion against God's will! This is why people doubt! They're not willing to accept the truth, but prefer strong delusion, rather than obey the will of God! Don't let it happen to you--and you know who I'm talking to! Snap out of it, quit feeling sorry for yourself, confess your faults to yourself, your wife, and God; and if the whole congregation already knows it, to them, too! But if you persist in standing in God's way because of your pride and unyieldedness to His Will, your disobedience will bring on an overwhelming flood of doubts and delusions, which may land you on the scrap heap, while God's work goes on without you, and she goes on with God! Which will it be? May God give her the guts, with or without you!

WE HAVE A NUMBER OF SHINING EXAMPLES OF THIS IN OUR MIDST, of the husband and wife teams that have made this combination work, of a gifted husband and wife, both talented in public ministry and faithful in the Lord's service, in which the husband is willing to let his wife perform her spiritual public ministries, in both inspiration, teaching, leading, and witnessing, while at the same time exercising his own outstanding talents in the same fields, as well as others that she does not have.--And look at the tremendous, phenomenal results! What a glorious example of humility and yieldedness and cooperation on the part of both! Look at what God can do with such a combination, and beware that you don't fail His Plan by standing in His Way! The days of your ignorance God winked at, but now He calls you to repent before it is too late! You have stood in her way before, and not only failed God yourself, but caused her to fail God, too! God has been patient with you and given you great space to repent, having been warned by both me, and even others before me--but now it's later than you think! There's no more time for foolish pride, and your fleshly, masculine, domineering! Get out of yourself, and get in the Spirit! Let go and let God work through your wife--now, before it's too late, or both she, and God, will leave you behind! This is a final warning! You've come close before--don't fool around any longer. We need both of you, every one of you, but no one is indispensable! Selah!

TOGETHER YOU CAN MAKE A TREMENDOUS TEAM, like my mother and father and a number of others! Don't hinder the Work of God by holding her down! Give her a chance; that's all God asks! You need her, and His Work needs her, but she can have no other gods before the Lord! She must go on with God! I hope and pray you can have the humility to follow! I hope she can have the courage to dare!

Quotes from GET IT TOGETHER--No.123

HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN, BOYS, SINCE YOU COMMUNICATED WITH YOUR WIFE? WHAT KIND OF COMMUNICATION, GIRLS, DO YOU HAVE WITH YOUR HUSBAND? If your communication with God is good, you will have excellent communication with your husband, because God is the central exchange that makes the connection. Without good communication with your Lord there cannot be much good communication between you. Because without good communication with God, you will be a God-damned, self-righteous, stuck-on-yourself, critical pig!

HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN, FELLOWS, SINCE YOU TRIED TO DO SOMETHING NICE, CONSIDERATE, KIND, FOR YOUR WIFE?--Something unselfish,--something she wouldn't even notice--something you might not even get the credit for--because you love her! That means real love--the kind that only God can give.--Because you are concerned about her welfare, and her happiness, and her feelings. How long has it been for you, girls? How long has it been since you have been unselfish for your husbands? That you did something for him that you didn't expect to get anything out of yourself?

I KNOW SOME PEOPLE HERE THAT SERVE UNSELFISHLY, sacrificially, utterly giving themselves to the utmost and yet never getting the credit for it, and are virtually unknown! But God has a great big Book, and it's known to Him, and He's writing it all down! And He'll reward everyone according to his works--whether they be good, or whether they be evil. What do you think you deserve? I know people you can walk all over, then just ball them out for mistakes--some they didn't even make--and they will still say: "I'm sorry, forgive me for having lived." (Luke 17:10)

Copyright (c) 1998 by The Family International

Tess and James Arendt
James & Tess Arendt

My name is James Arendt. I was raised in the Hegewisch neighborhood of Chicago, Illinois, served in the USAF from 1970 to 1974, and became a full-time missionary for Christ living 40 years in Japan, 3.5 years in Russia, and a few months in other countries such as Finland, Poland, Estonia, Latvia, South Korea, Taiwan and mainland China where I also served the King of Kings, Jesus, as an Ambassador for His Kingdom. My full bio.

If you like this website, you can show your appreciation by sending me a gift toward my support. My wife Tess and I moved from the island of Guam USA in June 2023 to the city of Allen in the province of Northern Samar, one of the poorer provinces in the Philippines. My only work is maintaining my websites, Deep Truths, and James Japan which costs me $300 per year now. And Tess is ministering to the local people giving them regular Bible Studies in three groups, children, teenagers and adults.

Photos of Tess's Bible study.

You may like my James Japan site as well because it covers subjects that are not covered in Deep Truths such as things like the Climate Change Hoax and the COVID-19 death-jabs.

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